HAY PIGGIES! Dressing up for Hallowe’en? It’s Dracula Bites Night! 🐹 🖤 💜 🖤 🧛 🦇 🥕

Ever give a piggy a bit of beet? Real “horrorshow,” if you know what I mean! Wink, wink, wheek, wheek! 😜

Check your piggy for signs of twinkly, fluffy vampirism—the dreaded Vampig or Vampiglet! Vampigs seldom do anything more aggressive than take an extra nibble of your finger, but if you notice any suspicious sparkling, distract them immediately with a vegetable and let them fang away until it passes, lest they turn into a fluffy bat and fly away.

Humans, however, may need a few more helpful hints for warding off the undead.

Traditional apotropaics—things believed to repel vampires—include garlic, Bibles, holy water, crucifixes, and rosaries. Another useful tactic is to exploit the vampire’s obsessive counting habits. If you suspect one is prowling nearby, scatter poppy seeds, sand, beads, or anything small and grain-like around the neighborhood. Vampires are said to be compelled to stop and count them all!

They’re also said to dislike metal, especially silver. If pressed, however, there’s always the traditional wooden stake through the heart—ash, hawthorn, oak, or aspen preferred. And in some regions of Saxon Germany, simply placing a lemon in the mouth of an unsuspecting sleeping vampire was said to do the trick. Who knew?

And remember: a vampire may not enter your home unless invited.

Check fluffy guests for excessive goth style.

Vhweek! Vhweek! 🐹 🧛